William Raveis Real Estate and Home Services

Posted by Deborah Schilling on 11/9/2017

The numbers of adult children still living at home with their parents has increased. Reasons why adult children are staying at home longer vary. Some reasons why children are choosing to continue to live with their parents after they graduate from high school or college include lack of employment, not enough income to pay rent or a mortgage and student loans.

Other adult children opt to stay at home with their parents due to physical, psychological or emotional challenges. Fear of failure could also play a factor in why children stay in the nest. As a parent, there are steps that you can take to prepare your children to move out and succeed on their own.

Give your adult children the tools to own their home

Start taking actions to prepare your children for home ownership early. Also, let your children know that they have options. For example, if your children donít want to buy a house, they could rent. The important thing is that your adult children have the confidence to launch.

To teach your children to be confident, allow your children to pick out their own school clothes, starting as early as four or five years old. Listen to your children when they share opinions that differ from your own. Ask your children open-ended questions. Engage them in non-threatening debates to strengthen their ability to research facts and communicate a point of view. Also, encourage your children to make friends and to build their own circle of social and emotional support.

Teach your children how to create a budget. You could show your children how to budget to save money for a new video game or a bike. Donít give your children everything. Let them use their creativity to devise positive ways to get what they want. For example, your children could barter or exchange toys with their friends. They could also sell old video games to game stores, earning enough credits to buy that new game that they really want. They could also operate a lemonade stand, sell newspapers or mow lawns. The important thing is that your children learn early that they can figure out how to generate income and manage money.Knowing that you can generate income and manage money is not enough. Your children have to see that they can succeed at that themselves.

Introduce your children to the stock market. Some schools teach about the stock market by participating in national stock market essays. On your own, you can review nightly market reports with your children. You can also ask your children to research stocks, bonds, equities and treasuries.

Take your children apartment and house shopping. You donít have to buy or rent. What you want is to expose your children to the apartment or house shopping process.Teach your children how to negotiate housing prices and whatís involved in the house buying process. You could start doing this when your children are in the ninth grade. Let them know about closing costs and the difference between fixed and adjustable mortgages.

Make your adult children pay rent to stay at your home. Charge rent similar to what an apartment would charge for a studio apartment. This helps your adult children to learn how to budget in real time. If you notice that your adult children are having difficult launching, consider raising the rent. Also, let your adult children pay for their own cell phone, food, clothes, car note, car insurance, entertainment and utilities.

As much as you may want to, you might not be able to support your adult children for the remainder of their lives. By teaching your adult children to exercise courage and to be self-confident, you could set your adult children up for success. This can take a lot of pressure and worry off of you. It can also give your children the tools to step into careers that they are passionate about, manage their finances and rent or buy homes that support their lifestyle.

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Deborah Schilling